Friday, January 20, 2012

Dealing With Your Parents

Some of you bristle when your parents start giving advice.  Don’t completely write off what your parents say, no matter how annoying they seem (Proverbs 15:5).   They know you well and you should bring all important decisions to their attention to get their input.  They love you and would be honored to be consulted.  When you start hiding things, you erode the bonds of trust.  Because your parents know you so well, they can almost innately know what will work for you.  William McRae in his book Preparing for Your Marriage explains that if you are dating someone and your parents intensely dislike that person, then you should beware because these marriages tend to not last.
If your parents did not go to college you will obviously be getting technical support from classmates, study group members, faculty and counselors, but your parents should always be allowed to speak in to your life (Proverbs 23:22) (Leviticus 19:32). 
“You don’t trust me,” says the daughter.  “You need to just get over it and let go already.  I’m grown up.” And now, using my powers of an older adult who works with young adults I will translate what your parents hear when you say this.

“Waaaaaaaaah! See how childish I am, Wwwwaaaaah! Let me have what I want. Waaaaaaaah!” 

Why would any sane parent extend more freedom to a child who shows a lack of maturity?  You must earn your respect, by being mature and proper submission is a sign of maturity. Here’s an adult tip:  Next time you don’t get your way from your parents, suck it up and accept it without pouting.  You can state that you disagree, but that you will obey because you respect them.  Wow!  That’s an adult response many adults never seem to learn.  Submission is a powerful form of love and it shows your strength of character. 
            Joseph (Genesis 39:20-23) and Daniel (Daniel Chapter 2) are excellent examples of submission.  Joseph became second in command to Pharaoh king of Egypt, but he started off as a faithful servant.  Daniel likewise was servant to the evil emperor of Babylon.  Both treaded the fine line of submission to authority while remaining faithful to God’s commands.  Joseph was thrown in jail over his convictions and left to rot, while Daniel was thrown to the lions.  Both were protected by God.  There will be times when you will stand your ground and God will supernaturally protect you.  Unfortunately God doesn’t always choose to do this and you will never know which it will be (Hebrews 11:35-40).